It is hard, it is physical, it is emotional, it is exhausting.....how do parents do it?
Potty Training.....no I am not ready.
I am not sure who is training who to be honest.....who is doing the work, the coaching, the praising, the clapping, the yelling in excitement.....but the one thing I do know....potty training is for the birds.
We officially started potty training on July 4th. Why on the 4th of July you may ask? No particular reason, other than I woke up this particular morning and said..."that's it, today I am going to potty train and she is going to use the potty!" Oh if only life worked that way, my way, wouldn't it be grand.
Back to the training......I woke up on the 4th and Josh put Meredith and Noah in bed with me. We snuggled and cuddled and then Josh took Noah to eat some cereal and I was left to change Meredith's diaper and snuggle with my girl some more....but low and behold the diaper was dry. Completely dry and I thought this is it....my big chance....let the training begin.
So I took off her diaper and brought her to the potty that had been collecting dust in my bathroom and then proceeded to strip her down and instructed her to tinkle on the potty. In my mind it played out quite nicely..... Meredith had to potty really bad since she hadn't gone since the night before and she magically sat on the potty and tinkled and we all clapped and danced and open a potty present and threw the diapers away!
Isn't that a dream, but real life doesn't always work that way like I was mentioning before so instead.......we had a 2 hour naked stand off. Our standoff included: lots of her asking for a diaper, pretending to potty and saying "all done momma", different babies tinkling in the potty, and lots of whining.
Approximately 2 hours from the strip down, she did it. She parked her little fanny on the little potty and tinkled...a few drops....she wasn't very sure if that was what I wanted her to do. After months and months of me explaining and showing her what it was that we did on the potty, she still wasn't sure. So I began to wonder....is this it? is this the right time? And then I remembered that she has started to tell me when to change her because she had pooped or was wet....yes dear self it is the right time.
About 30 minutes later she marched her little bare bottomed self back into my bathroom and sat her little tushy back on the potty and finished her tinkling. She did it! And again we clapped and cheered like wild hyenas and opened another potty present! Woohoo, she was starting to get it.....I tinkle in that plastic toy and my parents act like complete morons on crack and give me a present!
She then went the whole day with no diaper, never mind that we went to a party at Mimi's pool and she was in a bathing suit all day....beware all of you swimmers....if the water tasted funny it wasn't just the salt in it. Seriously though she got me out of the pool three times to potty and successfully went twice. She also got her daddy out three times and successfully went once. We have a lot of trial runs people. And she didn't wear a diaper at all yesterday, not even when we got out of the pool and only a pull-up to bed.
So again this morning she woke up dry and again I stripped her down and the potty standoff began. She finally succumbed to the potty and again we did the cheering and clapping and got another prize. Then we put on a pull-up and headed on our 1 hour drive to the coast for the day....I know who decides to start potty training when so much is going on. That my friends is the way I roll.
She did great though, she only tinkled in the pull-up once and she even had a really big potty break with a number 2 when we got home. We sat on lots of different potties today, really grossed me out and made me question my sanity for doing this potty training at all. At one point I thought diapers until the age of 10 were totally worth it to avoid the nastiness of public restrooms. We also got to listen to lots of other people tinkle and discuss it at a really loud decibel. I even heard the various potty goers chuckle at our conversation while we were sitting on the potty...
"Ummm that is the nice lady in the next potty tinkling like a big girl"
"Like a big girl momma?"
"Momma....listen....hear dat....is tinkle.....good job lady"
"Yes she did a good job, now it is your turn!"
"Momma, mizit finished"
"But you didn't do anything Miz"
"Das alright momma"
Yes you could hear lots of chuckling coming from lots of stalls. Everyone stuck around to wait for us to come out and wash our hands....no we had no successful attempts either....little shit held it all day until we got home.
So yes the potty training has begun, she officially has Josh and I running at her every beck and call. She gets presents whenever she tinkles even a little bit and they have to be wrapped. A present right of the dollar store bag will not do, I have to throw it in to a pretty bag with some tissue paper for it to be worth it.....luckily I can reuse the same bag over and over and that is alright.
So at the end of next week I am betting my little, smart cookie will either be potty trained or her daddy will be broke. Who is your bet on?