how quickly we forget....how quickly we learn

Today Josh and I headed an hour and a half north to the big city.  We had an appointment with a perinatologist to check out a few things with our new baby girl.  After our appointment, which was great, we decided to spend the day together without children.....thanks Mimi! 

A little back story....At my 20 week ultrasound, we learned the baby looked great, was a girl and that I still had a cyst in my uterus that appeared to be attached to my placenta.  The cyst was also there at my 6 and 10 week ultrasounds and we assumed it was a hematoma and would go away.  That wasn't the case.

We met Dr. P today and he confirmed I do in fact have a beautiful, perfectly round subchorionic placental cyst.  It was really weird to see, a perfect, little circle in ther with the baby.  The doctor and ultrasound tech were pretty amazed.  The good news is, it is no where near the cord and at this time, it is not causing any problems with the baby or her development.  Dr. P also said that he doesn't foresee any major problems, but he did tell us he does not have a crystal ball to predict exactly what will happen in the future.  This type of cyst is pretty rare according to him and each case can be very different depending on where the cyst is located and how big it is.  He has recommended that my regular ob follow up with a series of ultrasounds during my regular appointments to closely monitor the cyst to make sure it doesn't cause any constriction of fetal growth or any other issues.  Overall he was very positive and so was I....at least while I was in his office....I tend to worry a lot, if you don't know me. 

However, I have to confess for this pregnancy I have been pretty laid back in the worrying department.  Maybe it is due to the fact that I now have 2 tikes to chase and haul around and I really don't have time to get my head on straight to worry so much.  If I'm not doing laundy, cooking, playing choo choos or princesses, then I am way too exhausted to do anything other than sit and veg out.  So honestly, I had forgotten how much pregnant women do truly worry until my ultrasound 2 weeks ago.  Then the worrying mode kicked in to full gear.  With both of my other healthy and uneventful pregnancies, I worried constantly.  I think Dr. B saw me weekly for some crazy reason or another when I was pregnant with Meredith; and with Noah not quite weekly, but definitely bi-monthly.  My reasons for going to the ob were lots of things....the baby wasn't moving, the baby was moving too much, false contractions, pre-term labor, unexplained pain, uti's, or just because I haven't seen you in a while doc!,etc, etc. 

With the caboose I rarely have a second to worry in between appointments and when I get my reminder call 2 days before my appointment I honestly say to myself...."really it's been 4 weeks already?"   Then I had this huge scare with my cyst and I remembered real quick what it is to be pregnant and worried constantly.  The good news is, that the baby  is healthy and looks great, so each morning I will remind myself of that and go on about the day.

After our appointment, Josh and I spent the day together alone, we had lunch and we went shopping, in which we picked up a new ride (stroller) for the baby.  Why did I need a new stroller you may ask?  Because after Noah was born I swore I would never go through that again and was totally done with having chldren and so I sold everything baby related at our garage sale, except the crib and my children.  That means this baby needs a new car seat, high chair, swing  and a new ride.  I know....how quickly one can forget, I am sure as I am prepping for surgery early one morning in July I will remember why I said I wasn't doing it again......and then when I meet my baby girl, I will quickly forget all over again.

In the baby store today, Josh and I were like first time parents.  We had no idea how to get the car seat out of the base or how to put it in a stroller or how to fold the stroller.  I mean there was a label with pictures to show us and we still couldn't' figure the damn thing out.  We also have two kids, both who needed strollers and car seats and we used them successfully when they were babies.  After our frustration level got a little high we grabbed a stroller, forgot the rest and headed out of the store running.....determined to just relax on our day.  I'm hoping all this baby business comes back to us soon.... I mean I only have another 4 months to remember!

So to my caboose, while I may have forgotten a lot of things about babies and pregnancies I do know this.  I know that I don't need to worry about how I can love another child as much as I love the first two, because I already love you as much.  And I know that I don't need all that baby gear to be a mom, nope....I just need to make sure you are fed, changed, loved and not dumped on the floor by your big, jealous brother or smothered by your proud, new, big sister.  The rest I am sure will come to me as we go...you are just going to have to be my go with the flow baby...don't worry, we will quickly remember it all and if not we will figure it out along the way.