Today I am almost 10 weeks pregnant with you. Time sure has flown. No I am kidding. I found out I was pregnant with you at 3 weeks....who does that? Your impatient mother that's who. Yes, I found out exceptionally early and now it seems I have been preggers forever.....okay 7 weeks of throwing up is a really long time, it can seem like a lifetime....trust me!
No, I will never be able to give you the whole speech on how I was in labor for 19 hours with no epidural and so on....nope that one is for your sister. Your story will be more like for the first 10 weeks of your life as an embryo or fetus (whatever the politically correct term at the moment is) I laid on the floor all day and night, vomiting and wishing for death day after day. Yes, my child that will be your story when you are 16 and crying how unfair life is and how unfair that you don't have a car or license, or that your brother and sister are away at college with no curfew and your home stuck with me, with a curfew. I am perfecting that story now in anticipation. You just wait.
That being sad, this pregnancy thus far has sucked. I have not going one full day without vomiting or other disgusting ways of expelling bodily waste. Nothing taste good, my energy level is zilch and honestly I've been perfectly miserable. However, I'm super excited and can't wait to meet you....I know I really do feel that way, it's just hard right now.
In case you ever wonder what I am craving with you right now at 9 1/2 weeks preggers, here you go. Pickles, lots of them. Nachos, with lots of chili and cheese! Pizza, I don't know if I am craving that or just able to eat it, but I eat that alot. No sweets or chocolate, although I still eat it. NO soft drinks. If I drink coke or another soft drink it comes right back up. Vitamins or pills of any kind like Tylenol are unbearable and almost immediately follow with gagging and again throwing up. I do like orange juice, homemade pancakes, frozen french toast sticks and the occasional sausage biscuit from McDonald's sound great, but sometimes after it is front of me, I can't eat that either. Night after night I cook and don't eat. Okay I lie, once or twice a week lately I cook and don't eat. Your dad then runs and gets me something I try to eat and most of the time throw right back up. I just can't eat what I cook, the smells really gets to me, but I sit and pretend for your brother and sister. The other nights, your dad will pick up something and bring it home. I am way to exhausted and sick to go sit anywhere...the thought just makes me ill. However deciding what he will bring home in this little town with limited choices is awful. We play the "what can I eat" game and no matter what it is, it still isn't tempting or good. I keep trying sushi which is touch and go, sometimes I keep it down and others I vow never to eat it again. See how it's been.
Yesterday I went to the doctor and we got another ultrasound. At my 7 week ultrasound there was you and your little heartbeat of 151 and two very large polyps. Scared the crap out of me. I read online that they could increase the chance of a miscarriage and cause pain. The pain wasn't my worry, you can guess what was. At 9 weeks I went back and had another ultrasound to see what was happening with the polyps and got to see you again. You looked great. A nice, strong, super fast heartbeat of 187 (higher than your brother and sisters ever was) and you were moving all over. We could see your tiny arms and legs flailing all over the place. It was weird. Thank goodness the ultrasound tech pointed out your head and feet, because at first I had them upside down. There was also one very large hematoma, Dr. B said it was a hematoma and not a polyp and it would either go away on it's own and it was nothing to worry about. Your dad has hung your ultrasound pictures on his office door right next to all your brother and sisters pictures, he is very proud and super excited too!
I am going to go on record here and saying that I think you are a girl. I thought you were a boy at first, but now I am definitely thinking girl. Which means you are probably a boy, I was wrong with your sister and brother. Your dad also thinks you are a girl, along with most everyone else. Your sister prays nightly for a sister and has named you Margot. It's cute isnt' it, but don't be silly she didn't really name you. I liked it alot and asked her if she did and that was it she loved it and if you are a girl you will be Margot. Even if I name you something else I think she will always call you Margot. In fact, if you are a boy, Meredith will probably still call you Margot and she will probably want to dress you in pink too. She really wants a sister, however I think Noah would love a little brother. Right now he doesn't really get it or care, he calls himself "baby." You are totally going to rock his little world. He may take some getting used to you. Don't worry he will, Meredith adjusted just fine to him after many months!
Well my caboose, I just wanted to fill you in on my first trimester, I am hoping it gets easier and more fun soon. Your brother and sister are besides themselves that I am so sick. Meredith wants to know "momma why Margot always is pushing it out?" and little Noah always says "you otay momma, you otay?" We are very much looking forward to July and meeting you, my little #3!