Just can't get enough

Tomorrow I am headed back into the ambulatory surgery center to have another stent placed. Wish me luck and say some prayers. Kidney stones are just a bucket of fun!

In other news I haven't shown my house again this week, who wants to take bets on a showing tomorrow? Anyone....yes that is how my luck goes.

Today Noah decided to squeeze his body through the iron rails at the top of the stairs to let me know, baby gate or not....he could get through. As if I didn't have enough on my plate my little Houdini.

Meredith had a great day at school today, when I went to pick her up she didn't want to leave, that is one for the record books. She loves school, but she always loves coming home too.....well she used to.

Tomorrow Miss Carrie is coming to babysit while I have my very minor procedure. The kids will think it is such a treat.....they have no idea.....here's to hoping it is quick, easy and painless.

Also to my Pay it Forward people, I will email you guys as soon as all this kidney stone stuff is resolved. To everyone else thanks for the emails and prayers, I appreciate them. I also assure you I am not dying it just feels that way!

Does anyone know what day it is?

That is exactly how I feel lately. It seems like life continued on while I was in a dark sink hole this past week. Plans I had made and things that needed to be accomplished all went undone, yet the activities and deadlines moved on forward. We missed a birthday party, mardi gras parades, and lots of bad tv.

I am so out of it, I still feel doped up on medications somewhat. As I was driving to Target today I got a little light headed and thought, hmmm I wonder if I should be driving right now. But we made it in one piece and crossed off several things from our to do list that should have been done last week. It is weird trying to get back into the day to day.

In the course of my kidney stone drama, both of my kids were sick with a 24 hour vomit virus, my house was shown, my husband and I had a lunch date, and I cooked dinner. The sad part is I really don't remember most of it. I blame it on the many and various narcotics given to ease the pain. Thankfully I have a wonderful husband and parents who were there for me when I just couldn't do it on my own.

Today I am sorting things out in my head, getting stationery orders that weren't done on schedule out, calling the realtor to see about the showing I had forgotten about, trying to figure out where and how to go from here. Trying to get back on track. So bare with me as I get my groove back. Here is a little what she said to hold you over...

"My back is killing me......damn stones"

"Meredith, you have the stones too?"

"Yes, momma and dey are killing me"

The stone of death!

Wow, I never thought I would be back to blogging. Yesterday I thought I was dying.....a very slow and painful death at that. Thank goodness for doctors and drugs is all I will say.

When Meredith was 4 months old, I took a very unexpected trip to the ER in the middle of the night with kidney stones. As I peeked into my baby's crib I was certain that it would be the last time I saw her. I truly thought I was dying. It felt like my insides were being ripped out of me. It is a pain I cannot even begin to describe. My mom came over to watch Meredith and Josh whisked me to the ER. I remember standing at my front door crying because the 5 minute drive from her house to mine felt like it was taking an eternity. The 1o minute drive to the ER was even longer.

Once we were there everyone knew what is was immediately, including my husband. I was just too delirious from the pain to hear any of them and was sure I was on my death bed. No one could live through this type of pain and tell about it, I was wrong....I have gotten to do it twice now. Yes, it was a very treatable diagnosis that I was going to survive.....it was kidney stones. The rumor is true they are that painful, more painful than childbirth. I think I told off everyone in the ER that night and used some of the foulest language of my life. Then I got the drugs and life was better.

Fast forward three years later, that same stone was still there, trying to make it's way out. I am pretty sure you know where it comes out, and yes it is very painful. The stone in the past three years has also grown and was quite large, I saw it with my own eyes. In fact, it was so large, there was no way I was going to pass it, so I had to have it surgically removed.

I woke up last Thursday pretty sure I had a bladder infection or urinary tract infection. After a urine analysis, an x-ray and a CT scan, it was official I still had kidney stones. I scheduled a minor surgical procedure to have it removed the following morning. Let's just say that procedure wasn't as minor as I originally bargained on. However the pain meds were so good, I truly have no idea what happened that morning or how I got home. What I do know is that the recovery was more involved than my c-sections. No, I am not kidding.

Yesterday I went back in to see my urologist to have the lovely stent removed. You really should see what it looks like.....check it out here. I know amazing....and disgusting....and yes that was in me. So anyway the stent was removed and I thought I was headed to recovery. Well any other patient would be, but not me. My kidney started to spasm, which was some of the worst pain I have ever felt. In fact it was the same pain or pretty close to the pain I felt almost 3 years ago. Again I thought I was dying.

I called my husband sobbing on the way home from gymnastics, then I called my mom to meet me and help clean my house and pick up me and the tikes. Yes, at the very same time a realtor called to ask if they could do a second showing in two hours. If I didn't have this kind of luck, I wouldn't have any!

So my mom and dad rushed over to take care of the house and pick up me and kids. I cried the whole ride to their house and then I cried some more. At that point Josh gave me some meds and eventually my pained decreased. He then headed back to work and I took a nap with the tikes. After my nap the pain was back and I then began vomiting, which is very common with kidney stones. So Josh picked me up and left the tikes with Mimi and Poppa.

Thankfully my urologist and best friend's husband made a house call on his way home and gave me some pain meds and nausea meds and almost instantly I felt better. After a full night of sleep I am back to normal.

For the record......I hate kidney stones. I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy.

However I still have another, larger stone in my other kidney. For this stone I will schedule lipotripsy and try to avoid having to have it surgically removed. Wish me luck and say some prayers.

Starting out

Every where we go, people ask..."Has he just started walking?" And like the proud mother I am, I nod my head while beaming..."he has isn't he cute?" Most times I don't even have to add the "isn't he cute" part, people just add that in before I finish the head nods and replying yes.

My buddy, he is on the move. He walks with the biggest grin from ear to ear....beaming "look at me mom....I did it....I'm on the move." He occasionally will clap for himself and his whole face lights up.... as if saying "hey guys still a huge accomplishment...it isn't old yet!" And it definitely is not old. I could eat him up in his adorable toddling cuteness.

It's been a while since I have had a toddler....well not really, but it seems that way. There was so much of it I forgot. The awkward little steps, the looks of uncertainty but excitement simultaneously, the quick steps when they are on the verge of falling, they way they get back up undeterred when they fall, the arms up in the air as they take those steps, the way they struggle to stand on their own, the way they holds their breath when they're almost there. The way each and every time they stand and take off it is a new adventure.

I cherish these moments, because this time around I know they will be gone before I know it and in no time he will be running circles around me. Hell he already is.

My baby is growing up right before my eyes, and I'm just gonna take it all in.

Paying it Forward

My friend Brandi is doing this "pay it forward" thing on her blog and I thought it was pretty neat. I know the economy is in the toilet right now and it amazes me how people are still willing to pay it forward at times like this and it made me want to do the same.

So here are the rule....I am copy and pasting this from brandi's blog!

here are the details + rules:

1. Be one of the first THREE bloggers to leave a comment on this post, which then entitles you to a handmade item from me - something crafty or yummy, who knows?!

2. Winners must post this challenge on their own blog, meaning that you will Pay It Forward, creating a handmade gift -anything!- for the first THREE bloggers who leave a comment on YOUR post about this giveaway!

3. The gift that you send to your 3 Friends can be from any price range and you have 365 days to make/ship your item. This means you should be willing to maintain your blog at least until you receive your gift and have shipped your gifts. And, remember: It’s the Spirit and the Thought That Count!

4. When you receive your gift, please feel free to blog about it, sharing appropriate Linky Love! If you are not one of the Top Three Commenters on this post, you can still play along. Go ahead and start your own Pay It Forward chain, and encourage your blogging friends to do the same!SO, REMEMBER... Pay it forward!

Living in a glass house

So our house has been on the market for I don't know........
1 week, 4 days and 39 minutes. Yes I have 8 weeks to sell my house so I have 6 weeks and 3 days left....I like numbers. No pressure right?

Anyway for the first week of that 1 week and 4 days, my house was ma-tick-u-lus! Yes meticulous. You could have eaten off the floor if you so chose, which is gross so I doubt you would have. But that week if you wanted to it would have been okay. Any other day that I have lived here I definitely would have suggested otherwise even on Thursday afternoons, when the cleaning girl leaves.

Yes I have been cleaning my ass off and by cleaning I mean baseboards, cabinets, grout, and everything in between. This house has never shined so much. All of that effort and not a single bite. No quick showings, no calls, nothing. So each day my very impatient self started getting more and more discouraged. I knew this was not going to happen in 60 days. And I also knew their house probably wouldn't move either, but still it was discouraging none the less. I get the economic climate right now I do, I was trying to be realistic. It had been a week already....can you tell I have never done this before? Patience.....never my strong suit.

So Sunday reality hit, the economy is in the toilet, the moving isn't going to happen, I will probably go 60 days without a dam showing....my reality. I'm such a positive thinker. So with that I decided to have friends over in my freakishly clean home. Not a party just a handful of friends and 5 kids under the age of 3 who played outside in the wet and muddy yard. Yep, I had thrown in the towel. No one called once while the house was ma-tick-u-lus! So what the hell.

I tell you what the hell was...on Monday at 9am the phone rang....

"Hello Mrs. Pessimist, yes so and so from so and so realty wants to show you home today at 1pm."

WHAT! Ummm no see I gave up on that. I let my family actually live in my house, which means cheerios are strewn all over. I had friends over, friends with kids like mine who just want to be kids, which means the floors are dirty. I didn't do laundry, which means their are piles in the laundry room. So with that I realized I had 1 hour and 30 minutes to get the house clean and get 3 people dressed and out the door for gymnastics and would have no time after to come home and clean. So I did it. I got it presentable I called Josh who ran home at lunch and got what I missed and the house was ready...not meticulous but ready.

That night we got home and once again lived in the house. I cooked dinner and the kids littered the dinner all over the floor. We played, we lived, we messed up the house.

This morning I got up in time to throw on a bra, brush my teeth, make 1 tike very cute and adorable for school and then threw them both in the car to drop off Meredith. I then headed home with every intention of showering and catching up on work, but that just didn't happen. The showering part. So I picked Meredith up in my same funky clothes. Came home and began to tackle lunch and then do more work at nap time. And low and behold the phone rang again. Another showing....seriously. Two in two days? What the hell? Do these people know that last week my house stayed spotless because I forbid anyone who lived here to such much as breathe?

So I did it again. I cleaned the dishes, put away laundry, re-mopped the kitchen floors, picked up the toy room, made beds, wiped down counters and windows and doors. I did everything but get a shower. Right before it was time to show I loaded up two sleeping tikes who woke up very grouchy and headed to mimi's with a bag of clean clothes for me. I took a shower there and then our little family met some friends for dinner.

I wasn't taking a chance on a third day. We were eating out and not dirtying the kitchen just in case. No one was coming back in the house to mess up my hard work again! I am pretty sure that tomorrow their will no showings because I am prepared.

I don't know how people with two tiny tikes do it. How do you constantly live in the glass house? How can you be prepared to have your house ready to show on the drop of a dime? My toddler's greatest joy is to throw his lunch onto the floor. Did I mention that Brownie went to stay with Lily during this selling process? I have no labrahoover anymore!

I'm ready to move out of this glass house and into something a little more private. Selling a home is not for me. I really suck at it!

He is on the move!

Hey there mom......Here I come!

Just a week shy of his 15 month birthday and the man is on the move!

Not that I was worried or anything.....of course I was worried....I'm a mother. However I knew you would walk in your own time....their is no rushing you my boy.

Look how big you are my boy!

And you haven't fallen once despite the flash going off continuously in your face!

Congrats my little man! I am so proud of you! I'm sure you will be running in no time.

Friday the 13th crazy

Last night before Meredith went to bed she asked to sleep with me because her ears hurt. I knew for a fact she had an ear infection. Her normal m.o. for faking an illness is "my teeth are coming out." About a year ago, she was very crabby and restless while cutting her molars and she over-heard me tell Josh that I knew she wasn't feeling well because her "teeth were coming out....all 4 at once." Since then she has used that line daily when she didn't want to do something or didn't want to go to school or wanted her pacifier outside of her bed or wanted candy to eat instead of lunch and you get the point.

Anyway when she told me her ears hurt and not that her teeth were coming out, I knew the child really was not feeling well at all. So first thing this morning, I removed her foot from my rib cage and then called the pediatrician. At 8am. Yes, that time is very important. I called first thing and told them my daughter had an ear infection. They fit me in at 6:40pm. I am not kidding. At least they didn't make me wait until Saturday or even Monday, they have been known to do that. I was a little perturbed they couldn't see me sooner, but my favorite doctor was working the after hours clinic so I didn't complain too much.

We went and saw our doctor and sure enough she confirmed that Meredith indeed had a double ear infection. She was thinking it may have been a residual infection from last month. Great! So she called in some antibiotics and numbing drops to the pharmacy, checked out my Noah real quick just to make sure his ears were clear and then sent us on our way with two lollipops!

We got to Target to fetch the prescription and Motrin and then headed to the checkout line. While we were in line Josh told me to turn around and grab Meredith who was standing right behind me in the middle of the aisle. I wasn't sure why he had a look of panic on his face, she was only 3 feet behind me. Target was busy though, very busy, lines were 10 deep, so I turned to tell her to stay by me and then I noticed why he had that look on his face.

Meredith was dancing in the middle of the main aisle with her pants and panties around her ankles singing......"See my heiny cakes....you can see my heiny cakes....heiny cakes....heiny cakes....heiny cakes!"

I ran over and started pulling her panties and pants back up and telling her that she couldn't show everyone in Target her heiny cakes. "Why momma?"......"Because you just can't baby"....."But I want to momma"....."later, not tonight!.....must be those ears making you do this"......"okay momma, later."

With that we pulled up the pants, checked out and headed to the car. I am assuming her ears are so clogged that her brain is not functioning normally, that or she is channeling her inner stripper. This was a first, I was shocked. Her audience at Target had a quick chuckle and thought it was cute.

The night life!

It was about 6pm, just turning dark. We turned off the country two lane road from our subdivision onto the only and main drag in town. About a 1/2 mile ahead were lights...red lights, street lights, a digital billboard, lights from various stores like Target, Wal-mart, Chick-fil-A, Friday's, Old Navy, Smoothie King, and so on and so forth.

"MOM IS THAT THE CITY LIGHTS?!?!?"

I have given up trying to explain to her that we don't really live in a city, but more a town, or a suburb of a missing city, because this really is not a city. When I say we are going to the city, I mean New Orleans. Somewhere that has interstates and overpasses and actual traffic....not just stop and go lights. But yes I still bitch about the traffic like everyone else here, I am becoming a small town girl.

"Yes baby, those are the city lights."

Squeals and laughter explode from the back of the van. She starts and Noah follows suit. Their laughing is infectious. The other cannot help laughing when one starts.

"Noah we are in the city! Look at the lights!"

More squeals and laughter and lots of happiness.....I love it. Josh and I look and one another and smile. Life is good.

Hey Mom!!!

Yeah I just wanted to let you know I got up here again.
YAY!!!!! And then he claps for himself proudly!

My little Noah is quite the handful.....mischievous, daring, adventurous and for all of those things every bit as lovable. The other day he was touching the dvd player for like the 8739th time, and I corrected him for like the 12,942th time and then for the first time I slapped his little hand and firmly said "No....No touch!" Not hard, but enough to mean "no touch". He looked at me like I had suddenly grown three heads and was speaking Greek. He then went right back to the dvd player. So I redirected him to another room and like usual that worked.

Today we went to lunch with Mimi. I took Noah's cup away after he decided to pull the straw out and make a mess. I firmly said no and put it way out of his reach. He stood up in his high chair, leaned over and slapped me on the hand and said "nah!" I guess he did take in more than I thought the other day, too bad it was very ineffective for both him and I. I didn't give in to the slap, he then stuck that bottom lip out and the waterworks began. Life is so hard.

Melting my heart....what she says

"Momma come lay with me"

"Baby I have to go clean up, you go to sleep now"

"But Momma I need some lovin'.....just a little"

"Move over love!"

*****

"Momma....when I grow up, I'm gonna be Peter Pan.....okay!"

*****

"Momma, you wanna come to my birthday party last week?"

"Sure I do!"

"Great!"

*****

"Oh Noah man you are such a ham!"

"No Momma.....Noah's a boy!"

*****

"Momma, is Peter Pan a boy?"

"He sure is"

"Well one day when he grows up, he gonna be a girl"

In hiding?

Internets: Hey Mandi where have you been?

Me: Oh me, no where

Internets: Good we were thinking you possibly had broken all ten of your fingers and couldn't type since you haven't blogged in like forever.....I mean you didn't even take such a long break when you had that second tike!

Me: Yeah, I know. See I've been busy with work, but I already mentioned that and oh I put an offer in on a house and listed mine with a realtor. Yep I did, even in this crazy real estate market, because I just want to torture myself having to go through an "average of 120 days" of getting it ready for showings with two tiny tikes underfoot. Yep, that's why! It has nothing to do with finding my dream house, well Josh and I's dream house. Uh-huh we sure did!

So Internets wish us luck and join me on this wild ride of house selling. Josh and I have never done this. We are real estate virgins(this word will get lots of creepy visitors to the site....please leave!) Anyway we have never sold a house before and only bought once, so we definitely need some luck and sell your house vibes. We have 60 days......it will be a long two months or perhaps a very quick two months it depends on which side of the coin you look at!

An embarrasing work at home mom moment

As most of you know I own a stationery business and do stationery out of my home. If you don't know, you should and you should check it out....see how I shamelessly put a plug in for myself. Anyway I do, I work from home. I often take orders over the Internet and ship them out, but I also do lots of local business too. In which case customers have to come and pick up the stationery.

This week I have been exceptionally busy, don't get me wrong busy is good. I have had lots of orders, lots of big orders and managing a household and two tikes and the business can sometimes be a challenge. Today I had to really get things done, not a great day for my printer to screw up, but that is the way it normally goes though.

Anyway I sent the tikes to Mimi's so I could really get things accomplished. So I am in my pj's, no bra, haven't yet brushed my hair or teeth. In fact I haven't even looked in the mirror. What can I say....I am in my typical stay at home business woman's attire. I look a mess, there you go I said it.

I am enjoying my peace and quiet and cutting stationery when the doorbell rings. I knew I had several customers coming by to pick up stationery, but I was pretty sure it was this evening. So I thought it was maybe someone selling something or a UPS man needing a signature. I answer it and it is a nice looking young man who tells me his name....let's say Jim.

"Hi I'm Jim"

I gave him a pretty puzzled look, because he came back with...

"Jim Smith"

My look was about the same, by this point old Jim thought I was a nutcase I am sure.

"Yeah, Jim Smith, here to pick up the stationery!"

I think Mr. Smith was thrilled when the light switch finally went off in my head....yes....I got it now. We have only been emailing back and forth for a week now....I should know your name. I rushed over to get his stationery that was ready and waiting for him and ran it back to him, covering my bra-less chest with my arms.....yes way to draw attention to oneself.

So to Jim and his wife in case you are reading this....sorry. I am not an airhead....just a mom....a busy mom, but isn't the stationery nice?

Trying to grow up too fast - what she says

"Where do you guys want to go to lunch today"

Mimi says..."I don't care"

"Well if you don't pick we will wind up at McDonald's"

"MOM I wanna go to Fox's and have pizza"

"Okay then....Fox's good for you mom"

Mimi says... "What about Oscar's Meredith"

"Oscar THE GROUCH?"

Mimi says... "No Oscar's the mexican....you can get a chicken enchilada"

"I no want a chicken empalada....I want Fox's....I want pizza"

"Mom do you mind Fox's?"

Mimi says... "No that's fine"

"Meredith are you sure you don't want Oscars?"

"No, I want Fox's.....I no matter.....I no matter mom"

"It doesn't matter baby?"

"Yeah....I no matter"

"So do you want a taco at Oscars?"

"No mom....I WANT Fox's....I no matter"

Her first crush

"Momma....I LOVE Peter!"

"You do!"

"Yes, he is my friend boy!"

Every girl loves Peter Pan once upon a time!

A real man's man

Noah has a big sister......it is a fact of life. And due to this fact there are pink tutus, pink princess dresses, pink purses, tiaras and various other girly things lying around all the time. It is inevitable that one of Noah's favorite things to do is play dress up. Here he is the dress-up drawer.....

Hmmmm, what goes with this sparkly tiara?Awe, this earring goes perfectly!
I may not be able to point to my eyes, nose or ears on command, but I know where to put this earring.

Mom....please put down the camera and help me put my earring on dammit! -- Dont' you love the pink paci! Somewhere in blogland, Jeff Fitzgerald is cringing as he reads this - he has a sister it was bound to happen!

And to be honest, Noah has been dressing up for quit some time! He's also loved pink for quite awhile.

And while I was looking for those photos I came across this one, which describes Noah right now to a tee! It's okay mom, I'm not doing anything....you just go on about your business and don't worry about me at all.

And this one made me smile! Look at my happy baby boy! His smile is infectious! He makes me want at least 2 more!

When you are a mother, sometimes you eat your words

One of the few things I have learned about motherhood is to never say never when it comes to your children. If you do....you WILL inevitably eat your words. I don't make statements like... "my children will never....", "I will never do ..... for my children", or any other sentence with the words children and never anymore. Yes I have eaten my words....probably more than once, but last night I ate them big time!

When I was pregnant with Meredith we didn't think we were going to find out the sex so I did a really generic nursery (yellows and greens). I know not very creative or chic like this one, but cute. I also did that nursery on a budget, a resident's budget if you will. My mom bought the crib, the changing table was $25 from a baby store that was on clearance and the dresser was a built in so all Josh and I did was buy the bedding, the rug and the chair. I know, we did spend some money, but no where near what I did with Noah's nursery and Meredith's big girl room.

When my baby turned 17 months she moved into her big girl bed. She has always loved it, never gotten out of it, still doesn't get out of it and I would say transitioned beautifully from day one. So when we bought her "big girl" furniture I went all out and went all out for her bedding too. I had custom bedding, drapes, a shower curtain and window seat made. I spent a small fortune....now I realize this was not the wisest thing to do. However I chose a pattern that wasn't too babyish and could grow with her. That way I wouldn't have to change it again until she was like 10. I am laughing at myself as I type this.

Yes I even did the bathroom to match....a glutton for punishment.

When we discussed the possibility of moving I told Meredith if we moved she could have a pink room. Did I mention my child loves pink? Well she didn't quite get that we aren't moving and so the room stays purple idea. All she heard was PINK ROOM GET! So I told her for her birthday I would make her room pink and make it a princess room. This really made her happy. She has been talking about it for weeks. "Mommy I'm getting a pink princess room?"

Like all 3 year olds she has been brainwashed by Disney and now lives, breathes and eats all things pink, princesses and sparkly. It really is overkill. I extremely dislike Disney. UGH. So when I said Meredith could have a pink princess room I was thinking of this....of course the walls would be pink instead of green, but you get the idea.....

Because no way was my child getting a cartoonish type of bed spread with Disney princesses. I hate those. Don't get me wrong they work fine if you like them, but me.... I have a strange aversion to them and that is where eating my words came in. When I was picking out the fabric for her big girl bedding and she was too little to have an opinion I said...."My child will NEVER have a Disney princess bed spread." Yep, that is what I pretty much said, and for Noah you can insert....batman....spiderman....cars...etc. I don't mind the cute things with cars/trucks on them or fairies/crowns, but the cartoonish ones with the actual characters just make me want to break out in hives.

So yesterday I took my two tikes to Target to get a $16 dry erase calendar. I decided to browse the kids bedding to see if they sold canopies to put in the princess room I dreamed of. We started off by the bathroom stuff and ran into the princess shower curtain, towels, rugs, toothbrush holder and all the other over priced crap. My daughter went nuts.

"OH MY GOSH MOMMA.....LOOK AT DA PRINCESSES! It's for my room?!?!?"

And with that she started shoving it in the basket. So I obliged. I hadn't originally planned on redoing her custom bathroom, but what the hell. I had sold a lot of stationery this month and it was for her birthday.

Then we headed to the bedding aisle to see about the canopy and she saw this.....

Holy mother of God, she had just hit the princess jackpot. I have never seen a 2 year old so happy. Her whole little body lit up and started shaking with excitement and that was it. She was on a princess high that even I couldn't bring down when I refused to let her put it in the basket. She grabbed the twin comforter and cradled it to her body while shrieking in delight and started heading to the check out line. I priced it $32.99. Much cheaper than the pottery barn one I had my heart set on, but this was the one she loved. I thought about letting her getting for .02 seconds and then I told her no. I grabbed the matching sheet set off the shelf and told her she could get that instead. She didn't get discouraged or upset, she simply told me....."No momma, I get dis one for my pink room and my pink bed. I get dis one. I LOVE dis one."

I knew I was now competing with the damn princesses. Damn Aurora in all her pink glory....go ahead and brainwash my kid into thinking she needs all this pink stuff.....her room is a beautiful shade of purple....Why hasn't Disney made a purple princess yet?

So I told her..."Meredith we aren't getting that, it is ugly. Momma picked out a different princess one for you. We will get the sheets and paint your room pink and get the stuff for your bathroom, but we are putting that back." Her heart literally broke right there on the aisle in Target. And I thought to myself, let the girl get what she wants this is her room not yours. And so I did. I ate my words. My daughter has a princess bed. And I am okay with it. Although I am still in love with this one from pottery barn.

When we got home from school today her room was all finished. The first thing she did was run up the stairs to see it. She was in awe. It was the most beautiful things she had truly ever laid eyes on in her mind. She looked at me and said...."See momma, it's not ugly....it's beautiful!"

I have learned not to call anything she loves ugly ever again. And now her room and bathroom look like this. In two weeks, I will paint he damn room pink and I will lay in bed every night wanting to order that damn pottery barn bedding, but I won't. This is her dream room, not mine.

little noah

Dear Noah,

It's been a while since I have given an update on you. You are my busy bee. You keep me on my toes and running around. You are the happiest, sweetest baby around. You will go to just about anyone to give loving to, but are definitely a momma's boy. I love that. I can fuss or correct you and you just flash a sweet smile my way and the world is right. It takes a lot to correct you because of this and most days you get away with it all.

You still won't walk. You have walked multiple times unassisted, but still prefer to crawl or be carried. Except for when we are in public places like the library, Target, the grocery. Then you definitely want to get down and go, but you can't because you refuse to walk. Last night I said you may actually crawl to college, your Poppa thought that was hilarious and right on the money.

You are a climber, you can climb into and out of my bed, which is 3 1/2 feet or more off the ground. Your sister still has trouble getting in sometimes. You can climb onto your train table to play with your light switch. You climb on your little people garage and sit on top like it is your throne. You can climb up and back down all 18 steps.

You are very verbal. You make your wants and needs known. You say "bye-bye, dada, mama, uh-oh, bad girl & good girl (only to the dogs), sucka, and many many more things. You have no problem communicating at all. You love to talk to your Mimi on the phone.

You love to play outside, you climb up the ramp on the play set and come barreling down the top slide by yourself head first. You are fearless, which has me scared to death. You have now figured how to stand up, up top turn around and come down backwards on your belly, this too gives me a heart attack. I stand at the bottom ready to run to the side in case you fall. I don't go to the top with you anymore, because you will barrel down the slide even if no one is there to catch you at the bottom. The first time you did this I went after you holding on to your leg and we both slid down. We fell at the bottom on to the ground and you killed yourself laughing. My sweet boy. You also love to ride the pink jeep in the driveway. You drive it better than your big sister, she is still afraid of it. Not you, we have to keep you in the driveway or you would be off to Target.

Your appetite has increased dramatically. You are going to eat me out of house and home. You will eat anything and lots of it, as long as it is homemade. You don't care for take out or restaurants that much. You hate anything frozen or out of a can like skettie o's. You love my meatballs, meatloaf, rice and gravy, spaghetti, pork chops. Just about anything I make you will inhale. Kraft macaroni, you could throw it away without touching, homemade mac and cheese you devour. I cook more now because of you!

You are not quite my snuggly boy you once were. When your eyes are open you want to go. You only snuggle with me early in the mornings, otherwise you are busy hitting the road. You try very hard to do things independently like brush your hair and teeth. You try very hard to put your own shoes on, you get mad when you can't. It is really sweet.

You also love all things pink. I think this is from your sister, maybe you secretly like to torment her. You love to put on her shoes, her dress up, carry her pink purse, use her pink heels, cook in her pink kitchen, ride in the pink jeep and carry her pink babies. I'm okay with this and so is your dad.....we know you are all boy.

You are boy through and through, you are determined to get what you want. You don't give up. You don't care if you are messy, crawling through wet and muddy grass does not deter you. You always find a way to make a mess before we head out the house. You are boy through and through.

I keep calling you my baby..... you are definitely my baby, but I guess you are starting to be a toddler too. You are growing up so fast. I just love you to pieces my little guy!

Love,
momma

It's part of the job

So there is a situation of sorts going on here in our town that has made my insides churn and literally made me sick. It has brought so much emotion forth in me and made me want to put my tikes in bubbles and never let them see the light of day so they will never be hurt. I realize that this solution is not realistic nor is it what I really want. I want them to grow up free of dangers, illnesses, predators and anything scary. That is also not realistic, so I am going to just do the best job I can and pray for the best outcome.

I think my number one job as a parent is to love my children, to be there for them, to be honest with them and to keep an open line of communication at all times. No matter what choices they make or the roads they take, I will always love them and be there for them, that is my number one responsiblity. I also have to instill moral values in them, good values, values I was taught and raised with. I need to teach them to value life, all life. Their own, their neighbors, their families. I want to teach them right and wrong. That sometimes doing the right thing is the hard thing and the wrong thing is much easier, but that the right thing is the one that counts and they will be rewarded for one day. I want to teach them to dream, but at some point you have to start trying to achieve those dreams. Dreams are great, but they wont' pay the bills or buy you a new car. A person who only dreams and never goes after it, is just as bad as someone who settles and never dreams.

I want to teach them that every action has a consequence or a reaction. That these consequences and reactions are not always good, but necessary. I want to teach them that they will not always make the good choice or decision, but the most important thing is to learn from this bad choice and move forward with a lesson learned. I want them to know the world is a dangerous place, full of dangerous people. That the dangerous people don't always seem dangerous. I want them to listen to that little voice in their head, it is often correct.

I want to teach them to respect themselves first and foremost because if they don't do that, no one else will respect them either. I want them to respect their elders and their peers, even when they may not deserve their respect. I want them to be happy, to smile, to enjoy the little things in life. I want them to live life to the fullest and not waste one minute of this precious time here.

I want to cuddle them and protect them, but since one day they will be on their own and independent I want to give them the tools and knowledge to protect themselves. Even at the tender ages of 1 and 2, I'm going to start doing that. It is never to early to do that and you should to.

Chaos is the new norm

On Saturday morning we awoke pretty late....9am and decided to hit the open highway. Our cute little cousin Connor was having his first birthday back home in Louisiana and we were up for the adventure. We had approximately 3 hours to get ready, get packed and get on the road to have enough time to stop and grab fast food and make it to the party on time. We were out the house by 10 after 12, but what happened in those three hours were enough to make one's head spin.

We got everyone up and changed and started breakfast. Josh made pancakes, and the kids devoured them, so did Brownie and Maddie. Yes, Maddie was staying with us since my mom and dad were out of town. She is also a chocolate lab and takes up as much room as Brownie in the bed....thankfully she likes to sleep with Meredith when she is here.

Josh, who was feeling like complete shit was game for the trip and we were restless and ready to get out the house. We started getting everyone showers and dressing. Everyone was feeling better, but we still all had some coughing and runny noses going on. I attributed Meredith's less than stellar attitude to that simple fact. We also realized that in the weeks of sickness we weren't sure when the poor baby had went to the bathroom last and with that brought lots of tears, yelling, screaming and fighting trying to get her to go. Eventually we gave up and decided to deal with that issue when we got home, what's one more day right. (For the record she went after she did a little running at the party and all is better now).

Noah was also very cranky because he was up all night and ready for his one nap of the day. Instead of putting him down before we left, I kept him up hoping he would sleep the whole car ride. He thanked me immensely for this genius plan by crying and screaming and cursing me under his breath. When the boy wants to sleep, he wants to sleep, I will eventually catch on. He showed me what he thought about my plan by refusing to sleep until we were almost there.

We then got everyone dressed and ready only to have Noah find an open Hershey bar and get chocolate all over his shirt. I then chased him around with one of the stain stick pens and you know it really didn't do much for his chocolate stain. He was very curious as to what I was doing with it on his shirt collar that he decided to suck on his shirt to get a taste when I was finished. He is okay so I am going out on a limb to say it is nontoxic, even if the pen says otherwise. I realized that raising boys was very different than raising girls, Noah is always a mess by the time we get out the house and he is so okay with it. It is a mission that he is determined to accomplish.

Brownie decided she was rather upset we would be leaving her home all day alone and needed some attention. She decided to throw up in three different rooms, I guess she didn't think those pancakes were that great. Josh got the duty of cleaning up vomit, while I finished getting dressed. After my stain removal with Noah and dressing Meredith, I realized my hair had dried on it's own and had a nice wave look and went with it. My mom complimented my hair at the party, I didn't tell her I spent exactly .2 seconds on it, the time it took to remove the towel from my head after the shower and not another thing.

As we were about 30 minutes from take off, I realized that Noah was playing quietly in my bathroom. I went in to find he had broken my hot pink bottle of OPI nail polish and was in fact turning himself pink. He painted his face, his hands, my tile, the grout, but miraculously NONE of his clothes were pink and stained with nail polish. I know WHAT THE HELL! The tike is a genius, how did he do that? The bottle was broken and he was playing in the middle of glass and a bright pink pool of nail polish, and very eloquently painting his face and hands and everything else pink. Josh and I are so winning the Parent of the Year award for this one!

I yelled to Josh who came in to help with the situation. I wasn't sure if I could put nail polish remover on his skin or on his face. I did, I figured what damage the stain remover pen didn't do the finger nail polish remover would.....kidding....SO KIDDING. I only used a quick dab on his hand and when it proved fruitless because he had so many different coats on him I gave up and let him be pink for the day. His sister was pissed. I know life is unfair, she has only been wanting to be pink for months now and I let Noah be pink and not her.

After we cleaned the tike, the grout, the tile and finished getting ourselves dressed we got in the car. We then took a deep breath, said some choice words and then went back inside 10+ times to get everything we forgot. We realized that time was up and we were on our way, leaving whatever we didn't have behind. We made it to the party on time, it was fun, we saw our family and infected them all with this nasty bug. They will be thanking us next week. A few people asked if I spiked Noah's hair like that on purpose and why he was pink, I ignored them.

Life never goes as planned anymore, but that's okay. Josh and I have mastered adapting and overcoming. It is our new philosophy on life. One day at a time, one disaster at a time, one thirty minute interval at a time. After the party we decided to reward ourselves for a job well done and hit a favorite local restaurant. We sat there looking at one another and talking about how lucky we were and how grand life is and how good our kids were. They were playing with their food and drink quietly in their chair and we were thinking, life doesn't get much better than this. We then loaded up the car and hit the road for our long ride home. They were tired and exhausted and cried the last 30 minutes of our trip, we still thought we were lucky, we were just ready to fast forward this thirty minute interval and get home.

Like Meredith said, it was a good day. Yes a very good, ordinary, chaotic day....that's our life and we embrace it!