Lip Smackin'...Hip Shakin'...Foot Stompin'...

Today was marked a day of a big milestone for Margot....no not walking, she's been doing that  awhile now.  In fact Margot achieved this one way before her brother and sister.  I think Meredith did it for the first time at four and Noah at about three years old.  But Margot, she marches to a beat of a different drum....her own...Yes at a mere 14 months, Margot dug into my purse, fished out my peppermint flavored gum pack.  Opened it and then popped a piece into her mouth.  I figured this out as she came around the corner smacking her lips and chewing like a cow....while carrying  her container of gum.  She smiled from ear to ear when I saw her.  To make amends for doing something she knew she shouldn't be doing, she walked up and offered me a piece.  Sweet girl she is.

The boy likes his oatmeal

The other morning Josh put Noah in my bed bright and early and headed to work. Like before 7am early. Before I like to serve breakfast or wake up early. Meredith had got in our bed at 6am and snoozed off again. Noah on the other hand was not into snoozing and wanted out. So we headed to the kitchen.

I went ahead and got the instant oatmeal out and mixed it with some milk. I then put it in the microwave and ran to the potty around the corner. While I was in the potty, I heard Noah shrieking with annoyance. I was pretty shocked he hadn't followed me in to the bathroom to try and play with the water in the toilet.....yes, he loves to do this.

When I re-entered the kitchen I found him standing under the microvawe, pointing up at it and shrieking in protest. The buzzer had gone off and he apparently wanted the food out. As I opened the microwave to get his oatmeal, he squealed in delight and then toddled over to his seat and tried to climb in. I set his oatmeal down on the island to let it cool and helped him into his chair. He let out a screech of terror....."the damn oatmeal woman...I'm hungry....bring me the oatmeal.....are you not hearing me!"

I went back and grabbed the oatmeal and the usual two spoons, one for him to make a huge mess feed himself and one for me to actually feed him. He took his spoon and promptly threw it to the floor and opened his mouth wide like a little bird waiting to be fed. Apparently he was far too hungry to feed himself. I blew on the steaming oatmeal and his patience crumbled into pieces. He started to cry actual tears. I gave him his first bite and he was over the moon.

After he finished the entire bowl he was off, I even got a thank you! Now I know that when the boy wants his oatmeal, he wants his oatmeal.

Starting out

Every where we go, people ask..."Has he just started walking?" And like the proud mother I am, I nod my head while beaming..."he has isn't he cute?" Most times I don't even have to add the "isn't he cute" part, people just add that in before I finish the head nods and replying yes.

My buddy, he is on the move. He walks with the biggest grin from ear to ear....beaming "look at me mom....I did it....I'm on the move." He occasionally will clap for himself and his whole face lights up.... as if saying "hey guys still a huge accomplishment...it isn't old yet!" And it definitely is not old. I could eat him up in his adorable toddling cuteness.

It's been a while since I have had a toddler....well not really, but it seems that way. There was so much of it I forgot. The awkward little steps, the looks of uncertainty but excitement simultaneously, the quick steps when they are on the verge of falling, they way they get back up undeterred when they fall, the arms up in the air as they take those steps, the way they struggle to stand on their own, the way they holds their breath when they're almost there. The way each and every time they stand and take off it is a new adventure.

I cherish these moments, because this time around I know they will be gone before I know it and in no time he will be running circles around me. Hell he already is.

My baby is growing up right before my eyes, and I'm just gonna take it all in.

Hey Mom!!!

Yeah I just wanted to let you know I got up here again.
YAY!!!!! And then he claps for himself proudly!

My little Noah is quite the handful.....mischievous, daring, adventurous and for all of those things every bit as lovable. The other day he was touching the dvd player for like the 8739th time, and I corrected him for like the 12,942th time and then for the first time I slapped his little hand and firmly said "No....No touch!" Not hard, but enough to mean "no touch". He looked at me like I had suddenly grown three heads and was speaking Greek. He then went right back to the dvd player. So I redirected him to another room and like usual that worked.

Today we went to lunch with Mimi. I took Noah's cup away after he decided to pull the straw out and make a mess. I firmly said no and put it way out of his reach. He stood up in his high chair, leaned over and slapped me on the hand and said "nah!" I guess he did take in more than I thought the other day, too bad it was very ineffective for both him and I. I didn't give in to the slap, he then stuck that bottom lip out and the waterworks began. Life is so hard.

A real man's man

Noah has a big sister......it is a fact of life. And due to this fact there are pink tutus, pink princess dresses, pink purses, tiaras and various other girly things lying around all the time. It is inevitable that one of Noah's favorite things to do is play dress up. Here he is the dress-up drawer.....

Hmmmm, what goes with this sparkly tiara?Awe, this earring goes perfectly!
I may not be able to point to my eyes, nose or ears on command, but I know where to put this earring.

Mom....please put down the camera and help me put my earring on dammit! -- Dont' you love the pink paci! Somewhere in blogland, Jeff Fitzgerald is cringing as he reads this - he has a sister it was bound to happen!

And to be honest, Noah has been dressing up for quit some time! He's also loved pink for quite awhile.

And while I was looking for those photos I came across this one, which describes Noah right now to a tee! It's okay mom, I'm not doing anything....you just go on about your business and don't worry about me at all.

And this one made me smile! Look at my happy baby boy! His smile is infectious! He makes me want at least 2 more!

A day in the life.....

Tonight Josh was on the phone with a long time friend and Meredith is in bed reading.

"Hello....Hey Jon Shaw! What's going on?"


through the baby monitor
"jibber....jabber.....jibber jabber...."


"I've been good and you?"


through the baby monitor
"HEY DAD....ARE YOU TALKING TO ME? ARE YOU TALKING TO ME, DAD?"


"Hey yeah.....yadayadayada...."


through the baby monitor
"BECAUSE IF YOU ARE TALKING TO ME DAD....I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"


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Noah has taken to carrying around his sister's baby doll while hugging it tightly and laying his head on the baby's shoulder while patting her back saying...."Awwwwe!"


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Because clearly Tupperware drawers were meant to be emptied and sat in by little boys!

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And if you want to keep all of your fingers and sanity you WILL NOT throw away a finished cup of yo baby yogurt when the baby wants more. This will result in high pitched, shrilling screams that will leave your head spinning and cause years of therapy for both of you.


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It doesn't matter if you have a million things that have to be done....naps are purely negotiable.

An accident waiting to happen

Oh my Noah man, yes that is what you are. Right now your dad is finishing up your bath and you are squealing in delight. Seconds before you were crying huge crocodile tears, because you bumped your head....again. It's amazing we haven't had an emergency room trip for a concussion......or for anything for that matter.

In the past few days you have had some accidents that have made my head spin and some almost accidents that make me question my parenting skills. You fell four times while watching your sister at gymnastics yesterday. Each time your head made a thud so loud it hurt my head. Today alone you have fallen off of the rocking chair head first, you have flown out of your sister's baby doll stroller and hit your head on the ceramic tile floor, you fell face first while trying to walk. All of those things today.

Everyday I deal with things like this....you and your sister decided it would be awesome to push one another around the house in the baby doll stroller. You toddled and she rode, then she ran and you rode. The faster she pushed, the louder you laughed and squealed. Then she hit a bump and you literally flew through the air and hit your head on the ceramic tile. You cried and cried, but not because you fell....you cried because you weren't IN the stroller anymore and you wanted back in it. In fact it wasn't really a cry it was more of a I'm pissed off type of scream, so you fixed the situation.....you crawled over and got back in and yelled for her to push you again.

Even though you are sick with a fever and bright rosy cheeks and a faucet for a nose, it hasn't slowed you down one bit. You head dove into my suitcase this morning. You head dove into the Tupperware drawer, you tried to head dive into an empty bathtub. Nothing slows you down and these are things you do everyday my dear....everyday.

Yesterday after the washer incident, we had another life threatening incident. I didn't have the baby gate locked at the bottom of the stairs, you noticed this and took full advantage of the situation. The phone rang and while I answered it, you took full advantage of my lack of attention. You easily slid the gate open and were on your way. I also had laid my scissors that I had out wrapping gifts down on the steps...I know who let me be a mother? By the time I hung up from my 5 second conversation you were no where in sight. I called your name to hear you giggling from the top of the steps. I rushed upstairs and there you were sitting at the top grinning from ear to ear, holding on to my scissors. I shudder at the thought of what could have happened. I wonder at what point the Internets may call DCFS on me.

You are a climber, it is your nature, it will be the death of me. You aren't in the least bit cautious or careful, you focus on your destination and you get there no matter how hard it seems or how dangerous it may be. I know some people may thing you don't understand danger and that is what I am for, I totally agree. However I have a child older than you my dear and she is the very definition of cautious. You are so different. So free spirited, so determined, so adventurous.

If I survive your toddler hood I will be so proud of myself for keeping you out of harms way. But every now and then can you throw me a bone kid and just sit still for 10 seconds? I love you my little man, but giving me heart attacks everyday is killing me. My little accident waiting to happen.

A Heart attack!

Dearest Noah,

I wanted to let you know that if you ever climb into the washing machine again you are going to time out! I don't care if you are only 13 months old. It only took you 2 seconds to get away from me and into the washer. Luckily I found you before you sister closed the door and started the thing. You are sure to give me a heart attack before you are two.

Love,
Momma

Because sometimes it is okay to think the world revolves around you

"Momma I go see Meredarif in her pink-tard" meaning I go see my dancing pictures on the blog

"Okay, come on" scrolling through to the ballet pictures

"Awe look at Meredarif how bootiful" watching as I continue to scroll to Noah clapping

"Awe look at No-wee proud of Meredarif"

Although he could have been clapping for a millions reasons, today it is okay to let her think he is clapping for her. One day I will teach her the world does not revolve around her becuase she won't get anywhere in life thinking that, but this morning I will just let her think it does!

A Revelation of sorts

Today I was outside pushing Meredith on the swing when out of the blue....


"Momma my name is Mere-da-rif"

"What?"

"my name is Mere-da-rif!"

"Yep, your name is Meredith, good job bug!"

"No momma, my name is Mizzie"

"No your nickname is Mizzie, your name is Meredith"

"Mere-da-rif, Mere-da-rif, Meredaaarriiff"

"Yes it is Meredith, great job, now try Mere- ra- dith"

"Mere-rrrra- ddddiff.........Mere-da-rif!"

"Great job bug! I love it!"

"I love Meredarif too!"


I think her days of calling herself Mizit are over, I will miss them. She is still holding on to Mizzie though. I think Josh is going to be saddest of all. I secretly think he wishes he named her Mizit himself. Mizit Grace, it does have a good ring to it!

The Yellow Pudding

Oh the yellow pudding...I am sure our neighbors are all sitting home tonight saying "Why don't they just give that child a yellow pudding!"

Tonight during our nightly jaunt around the block, Meredith declared that she wanted "yellow poods" (the word poods rhymes with hoods).

She did not ask, she did not say "May I...", she just declared in her very declaring voice that she wanted "yellow poods!"......"I wan yellow poods MAMA!"

So I said Meredith you are being sassy....how do we ask? And to that I got a screaming reply of "YELLOW POODS!" Yes ladies and gentlemen, I was pretty sure tonight that we had created a monster. So I told her no pudding until she asked nicely. Mind you we are walking around the block at the time. Well Josh and I are walking, her and Noah are in their new ride.

So she then says nicely...."Mama yellow poods peeze!"

"Oh Meredith good job asking please! You can have a yellow pudding when we get home!"

We had just started our walk and believe it or not I don't carry yellow pudding around with me. We still had the whole circle which is about 1/2 mile to go. The "you can have one when we get home" answer was not what my 2 year old wanted to hear and with that answer she unleashed an ugly beast. For the rest of the 1/2 mile trek she screamed "yellow pood!" at the top of her little lungs....which are very impressive.

She then started to kick and she scream and carried on in a way that I just wanted to climb under a rock and hide. Luckily she was belted in or we could have had some major head injuries from the thrashing she would have done on the pavement. Yes....it was that bad my friends..... Meredith's little world as she knew it was crashing down. How dare her parents now produce the yellow pudding on demand.

And this went on until we reached our driveway....at which point I asked Josh if he wanted to go again. And we did. Another 1/2 mile lap. My little terror continued to carry on with her beastly behavior on the 2nd lap as well. Poor Noah, he didn't know what the hell was going on. He just relaxed on his side the Cadillac laid back listening to the three headed monster next to him.

I am proud to say that I stood my ground, when we got home. I didn't fetch the yellow pudding. Instead I carried her little crying butt all the way upstairs and threw her on her bed where I proceeded to undress her and then Noah for their baths. At that point the frown was turned upside down as she sang the "naked baby" song and danced with Noah on the bed.

Yellow pudding....what yellow pudding!

Missed the boat on that one....

Today Meredith and I were watching her favorite show together, Calliou. I used to hate the show, but after watching it a few times have grown to like Calliou and Clifford for that matter. They actually try to teach lessons....sharing....being nice....being polite....etc.

So in the particular episode we were watching, Calliou did not get his way and decided to throw himself on the bathroom floor kicking and screaming. I was pretty surprised...in all my Calliou watching days I had never seen him throw such a tantrum. His dad just stepped over him and proceeded to go on with other activities to distract him and not give in. Calliou continued to throw his fit and eventually got over it and they were all happy again.

I thought wow, this actually applies to us now. So I decided to use today's episode as a teaching tool....

"Meredith look Calliou was mad and he threw a fit."

"Calliou mad....he cwies"

"See he was kicking and screaming and being mad!"

"Calliou is sad, momma!"

"Yep, see he was being bad because his dad told him No"

"Uh huh......NO, NO DADDY.....BE NICE TO CALLIOU!"

Oh well, I will continue to try.

The doctor is in....

Last week when Meredith was sick, we went to the doctor twice in two days. She learned a lot in those two days. She learned that the doctor put something up to your chest to listen and says "great job Meredith!" She learned that she also uses something to look in your ears and in your mouth....at which point the "gockga says Ahhhh." She learned that the doctor will also say "great job mizit" for that too.....and then you will get a sucker. She also learned that it really sucks when you have to have blood drawn in the lab, but you will get 2 suckers.

Yes she learned a lot in those two doctor visits. So much that when she got home she grabbed some tools that sort of looked like the doctor used and made Josh and I her patients. She was a lot rougher than the pediatrician and we did not get suckers.

So on Saturday her Daddy bought her, her very first doctor's kit. Now "Mizit is gockga" too! This lovely doctor's kit even came with a pager and cell phone. Look below she is wearing it just like her daddy does. I already want to throw her pager in the toilet with his.

Today when her pager went off for the 100th time this morning it hit her....her daddy might be a "gockga" too!

"momma....mizzie go work!" holding her ringing pager

"Did the hospital call you again sweetheart"

"uh-huh"

"gockga mizzie....toddler talk...toddler talk" hangs up....."bye bye momma"

"Are you leaving?"

"uh-huh....mizit work"

"See you later, have fun at work!"

If only she could bring home a pay check. Oh wait that would be against child labor laws. Oh well. Here is a picture of "gockga Mizzie".....yes we have given her nickname a nickname.

She is my daughter...

Today when we got home Meredith wanted to go slide, not unusual....she always wants to slide. Unfortunately for her it was nap time so no slides. When she woke up, her dad walked in and he asked if she wanted to go and slide! Of course she did, she always wants to slide.

So she put on her pants and her socks and shoes and then her dad brought in her jacket. It is a little chilly here so yes she needed a light jacket. The very same jacket that she tried to put on 2 weeks ago in 80 degree weather. The very same jacket that she wore all fall, winter and spring. The very same jacket that has the attached hat that she LOVES. Yes that cute, pink windbreaker that I paid way too much for at Gap.

So once she was properly dressed, she went outside to slide with her dad. I stayed inside to begin dinner with Noah.

2 seconds later, in came Josh and Meredith. Meredith had tears flowing down her cheeks and was sobbing.

"What's wrong?"

"Meredith doesn't want to wear the jacket, so I said no jacket....no slide!"

"Really? She didn't want to wear the jacket?

"Nope!"

"Is she already that stubborn that she would rather come inside than wear damn jacket!"

"Yep, I have no idea who she gets it from."

"Me either" laughing to myself

She is now inside happily playing in her toy room.

What she say?

Quoting Meredith....

"No, No Momma says!"

"Momma says.... Oh shit!"

"Daddy says...No, No Bwownie"

The things this child makes up....I hope she does not say this at Mother's Day out!

It only takes a minute...

for a toddler to make a mess!

This morning I was rushing as usual to get out the house. I had a board meeting for the organization that they made me the treasurer of.....dumb, dumb move! Anyway I am halfway dressed, Meredith has eaten breakfast and Noah has eaten and is dressed. I am now sitting down in my room to pump some liquid gold for Noah to bring to his Mimi's to eat during my meeting.

So I am listening to Meredith, who has free roam of downstairs while I pump. I cannot exactly chase after her while hooked up to my stylish pump. This is what I hear coming from the playroom....

"Hi Woody, Hi Jesse!"

"Jesse want milk?"

"No, no Woo-day!"

"Sit! Sit down woody!"

"Jesse want some....otay....otay!"

"Mmmmm, yummy!"

"Woody want more....say pease!"

I then hear her grocery cart being pushed into the kitchen...maybe she is going shopping in the pantry again? Then I hear her pulling out a barstool and climbing up. This is what I hear from the kitchen....

"Mizit get it! Mizit get it!"

"Wait, wait Mizit get it"

"Want some Jesse?"

"Mmmm, Mmmm!"

So I unhook my utters and run into the kitchen to see exactly what Woody and Jesse were having to eat?

Salt!

She had emptied the whole bottle. It was all over the kitchen island and all over the floor. Which would only make sense, since Woody and Jesse were laying on the ground next to her stool. How else were they going to eat the salt?

Like I said it only takes a minute for a toddler to make a mess.

Pay da lady....take 2

So tonight we went window shopping at ToysRus! I know what a dumb, dumb parenting decision. Josh and I learned two very valuable lessons on this window shopping adventure.

1. You CANNOT reason with a 2 year old.

2. I CANNOT window shop.

So we went browsing, to see what great things the Easter bunny may bring. He has not done his shopping yet....slacker. So we walk in and Josh walks right past the buggies, uhmmmm hello ....get one please. So he does, and says ...

"I thought we were just browsing?"

Yeah okay!

So we walk in I get some egg dye stuff for tomorrow, an Easter basket for No-wee and then head to the coveted Woody and Jesse doll. These are a little bit bigger than the other's she carries around. Mimi had previously scoped them out and told me about them so after dinner I decided we all needed a trip out the house and were going to see Woody and Jesse. We were not going to buy them tonight. The bunny was not going to buy them tonight. We were only window shopping. My almost 2 year old would get this right? Right? Come on...right? Yeah I do not know what the hell I was thinking either.

So we walk up to them, it takes a minute for her little brain to process what it is she actually sees sitting on the shelf in front of her. She rushes up to the shelf grabs one off, wraps her chubby little arms around it and looks at me with the sweetest brown eyes and says....

"Pay da lady momma!"

And that folks was that! The really fun and exciting part was when we had to take them away and tell her the Easter bunny may bring them by this weekend if she was a good little girl. Yeah we were smoking crack alright. I do not know what we were thinking, but we were in agreement that it was a bad, very bad parenting decision. Two year olds cannot windo shop, do not expect them to.

So we left with our egg dye, Noah's easter basket, two fisher price items since they were on sale by one get one free and NO woody and Jesse doll.

Yes the Easter bunny is running by tomorrow on his lunch break to pick up the dolls, we are not that mean!

I promise I'm not going mad.....

I really am not a mad woman, I just had a crazy morning. Let me just tell you about a small part of my day....about 20 minutes actually. I had to run to the bank to deposit a rather large check....a check from a local hospital made out to the organization that I am the treasurer of. And did I mention it was a rather large check.

So I pull into the drive-thru teller at the bank. I pull up to the window of the building, not even one of those electronic "shoot the money to you" things. I go to the actual person so I can give this check to her and feel a tiny bit relieved that it is finally out of my hands. I rolled down my window and said hello and explained that I did not have a deposit slip because the check book is out and I forgot to grab a new one and yadayadayada. Then I put the check in the slot and as soon as I did a big gust of wind came through and took the check right out of the slot and into the air. Seriously. I am so not making this up.

So I yell "OH SHIT!" and everyone in the bank, tellers included are looking at me. To add more fun to the chaos my daughter in the back seat is now screaming....

"Oh Shit! Oh Shit Mama! Oh Shit" and laughing hysterically.

"Yeah baby....Oh Shit is right!"

I pull up about 10 feet, throw the car in park, jump out and start chasing my check that is still in the air. It travels all the way to the next parking lot, which happens to be a Krispy Kreme. The bank tellers are now outside, one standing guard at my minivan as I chase a check and the other helping me chase the check.

Yeah me in my sweats and the teller in 4 inch heels and a mini-skirt. Can you picture it? As I am chasing this check, I can still hear my toddler screaming "Oh shit! Mamaaaa Ohhhhh SHIT" Apparently she got even louder to make sure I could hear her since I was no longer in the car acknowledging her new word.

The check finally settles under a car, we just are not sure which one. So bank teller in the mini and heels and myself are on our hands and knees in the parking lot looking under various cars. I politely tell her in a very demanding voice, that we have to find it....it was for X amount of dollars and I need that check. I would not even know who or where to call and try and explain what happened to this one. And like they would believe me anyway.

Eventually the teller found the check under a tire. Thank goodness!!! Really can you see me explaining this one to anybody? And then asking to issue me another check? So now with the check in the teller's hand, I jump back in my mini-van and drive back around to the teller. Meredith is still saying....

"Oh shit mama! Oh shit!"

"Yep sweetie, that was definitely an Oh shit moment! Honestly it was more like a Oh fuck! moment but you are way too young for that!"

"huh?"

"nothing baby...Oh shit is right!"

And that is how I ended my morning....deposit slip in hand. I happily drove away from the bank, with Meredith singing her new "oh shit" song.

Going on an egg hunt!

Hunting for eggs! She was not really into this at first, but gathered some with lots of encouragment. Seeing what is in them!
She then quit hunting for eggs and started eating. Cany you see the other kids still hunting for eggs!
When we got home she was adament about carrying the basket. So I gave it to her and she stopped and set it down, grabbed the candy out and left it. It sat right there in the garage until I fetched it.
Do you see all the open...empty eggs!

Sounds from meredith's room this morning

"Woody, Woody!"

"Woody, Woody where are you!"

"Woody, I can find you!"

"Woody! Woody!"

"Jesse where Woody?"

"I no know"

"Dare you are! Dare you are woody!"

"it otay woody!, it otay!

"woody be tareful"

and I hear some smooching going on, not sure who is kissing who!